I have been selfishly pining for this day all week. I have; silence light rain an empty house and holy shit does it feel good. Dave spent the week working in Wellington and upon his return yesterday, Nixon gave him a cursory glance and a …
I was phaffing about the other morning trying to do All The Things simultaneously as per usual. I wandered out of the bathroom whilst brushing my teeth, thinking that I would put the washing on. En route to the laundry I spied an errant plate, …
I’m not going to write my usual bitch ‘n moan style post about the school holidays as I’m not feeling it this year. E and I have had some hard days, but we’ve moved on and had some totally kick-ass days too. Those days make it all worth it. Being 10 is hard but I think after a lot of talking and thinking on both sides, Ethan, Dave and I have landed at a good place to kick off Term 1. One of the most amaze qualities I’m noticing in my big boy at the moment is his ability to completely separate whatever feelings/frustrations he has going on with his Dad and I, and still lavish heaps of love and attention upon his little brother. Nixon is so lucky to be forever under the wing of such a natural big bro.
Dave is heading to Wellington to work for the next week so the boys and I have some fun activities lined up that we will mix up with low-budget days exploring and beaching. Aside from the l o n g days of solo parenting when Dave’s away, I’m feeling a bit stressy about my running – I won’t be able head out first thing in the morning for 5 days! I’m such a massive creature of habit that the thought of running at night once mum gets home and it finally cools down kinda fills me with dread. To say I’m inflexible in my routine is a bit of an understatement! This weather has made for such a stunning January it’s been easy to maintain my little goal of saying ‘yes’ and milking summer for all it’s worth. The flip side of this {of course there is always a flip side right?} is that my blogging motivation is lacking, but I’m definitely not beating myself up over that. It’s not the season for me to write, but I have been working on some exciting plans and partnerships for the months ahead, things are ticking along at The Best Nest and I’m so excited about 2015!
That’s all, go forth and may your Sunday be maxxed out with awesomeness!
After Nixon was diagnosed with Hirschsprung’s Disease we were told to expect that toilet training would probably be late, be very hard work and would likely take a lot longer than other children his age. We were prepared for the worst basically. What we have …
Before finishing off Nixie’s Christmas Shopping yesterday, I was enjoying a bit of downtime getting my nails done and chatting away to the nail tech. We were {of course} discussing our kids and their Christmas wish lists. She was so sad to hear that I …
Thanks to Rexona Invisible Dry for sponsoring this post – originally published on nzgirl
I am a Mum. I am also a stay-at-home Mum.
Every choice you make as a mother comes at a cost; the equal and opposite alternative to your decision to stay at home or go to work will always be there, niggling a little on those tough days and always reminding you of what you have given up.
For me, dealing with the daily predictability of an unpredictable toddler and a pre-teen means I have to stay focused and keep my head in the game – the game may be as unglamourous as getting the laundry done and the beds made but that’s my reality right now. Getting stuck in my own head and focusing on the minutiae of everyday domestic life will no doubt result in a spanking clean kitchen but it won’t help ease the professional yearnings I left behind when I bid adieu to paid employment.
But, being present, visible and in the moment with my kids does and will fulfill me in ways that I never expected before I had children and that I don’t think I could replicate any other way. But, you have to be open to that fulfillment. Over the past week I’ve been practising a little trick I call Stop & Drop. Basically, I have promised myself that when my 1 year old brings me that book about diggers we have read 172 times already today, I will stop what I’m doing, drop the dish towel and sit on the floor and read to him. When my big boy wants desperately to show me his Minecraft creation that I have zero interest in, I will stop what I’m doing and sit at the computer with him for five minutes and simply look and listen.
Breaking the habit of saying “No, Mama’s too busy” is hard, it requires me to let go of my ‘perfect house’, ignore the crumbs on the floor, breathe through nap-time strikes and relish this time with my babies above all else. It’s learning not to sweat the small stuff, and radically loving the bigger picture, be it your kids at home with you each day, or the joy you feel when you pick them up from daycare. In both my prior role as a working mum and currently as a stay at home mum, one thing I simply don’t have time to worry about is excess sweating. Post-baby body issues and being spotted in your around-the-house uniform of yoga pants are enough of a battle without the stress of ruining your clothes with sweat stains. Rexona Invisible Dry has worked for me, the 48 hour protection keeping me feeling fresh, even on those days when a shower has slipped to the bottom of the priority list!
There are many areas where we can feel like we’re failing as parents, try sweeping the slate clean, cutting yourself some slack and getting real with the expectations you have put on yourself as a mother. Make some micro-goals and try and work them into your week; if you’re worried the amount of fish finger dinners getting served, allocate one night a week to try a new, healthy recipe, if you’re worried about screen time incorporate some outdoor activities or simply get down on the ground and drive toy cars around the house for half an hour. Simplify and you will be amazed at how your kids react, they will LOVE it!
Practise makes perfect but simply being a mother who is visible, present and accessible to her children is the best kind of mother there is.
After a slightly bumpy start to the weekend involving husband away on a work project, bronchitis, being locked out of the house, bleeding/vomiting dogs, dogs shitting on carpet, grumpy-ass children, children weeing on carpet……culminating in Fish ‘n Chips and bourbon on Saturday night, I woke …
Thanks so much to Sovereign for sponsoring this post. As part of their #lifetakecharge campaign Sovereign have identified sleep, along with eating well, exercise and happiness, as four essential pillars to well being and I couldn’t agree more! Sleep (and in many cases, the lack thereof) can be all …
Pass the wine.
For the past 13 months I have been self-righteously patting myself on the back, mentally high-fiving because the huge age gap between our kids has been a huge non-event. And truth be told it hasn’t been difficult in any of the ways one would expect;
There has been a storm quietly brewing though. Stewing and simmering, rearing it’s head every now again amidst protestations against iPad time limits and run of the mill simple requests are being constantly met with opposition and resistance.
It’s doing my freaking head in people.
I have to admit, The Age Gap problem is real and it’s pretty much living in my head. Changing channels between the totally transparent requirements of 13 month old Nixon and the ever-changing, complex analysis and head-nodding required to keep pre-tween E on an even keel is SO HARD. I almost cried and ran to my room about 17 times this week.
Big is going through a phase which apparently requires compulsory attempts at control of all situations and as many arguments as you can fit in the day. Thank god I have a hair appointment on Saturday as I can actually see my grey hairs growing before my eyes.
So. That’s life at the moment. In baby news, Nixon’s bum rash has stopped bleeding and his appointment today with the surgical team went really well! He also loves meatloaf and making animal sounds. Yah age gap!
Oh this week. Oh every. single. day of this marathon week of crapness. Currently on day 12 of massive sinus infection. Dave took the day off on Tuesday as I was completely useless and took my ass to the doctor. I cried in the waiting …